“Yeah.”, my eyes closed feeling every bit of it beyond measure.
“She’s doing her Alpha cat bit. No worries, she won’t embarrass you.”
Shit. Please not another one of these…
“That’s just weird. Here I am humping your balls off…”
“Yes, and loving it too…”
“Oh yeah. It kinda creeps me out…”
I fell asleep after we came. I have been going hard for longer than most people live. There was black metal in the background from my almost infinite finite playlist.
I felt out of body in another dimension. In another body. It felt like me and didn’t and certainly didn’t look like me. What? How am I seeing myself feeling like I am inside this body, not a share mind you? I am now feeling the doom which precludes the insane plunge out of control into the vortex of the abyss. It feels like a dry retching of blood and intestinal content gases. Needing to vomit and not able. It feels like an endless cycle of the pain of knowing I am dead, body still feeling it…
“Everything always made perfect sense when we connected in this trance. Sorry, I know you like to call it a state. However, this state comes on automatically with multiple anchors. We don’t miss…”
I could feel the greatest pleasures we’d ever had…there seemed to be almost endless memories merging into one scenario. Now touching her again when something with a pungent stench grabbed her in less than a blur. She’s gone wow.
A giant black paw with beyond razor-sharp claws now swiped out in front of me.
A great burst of opalescent slime squirted and filled the fields I perceived, and I felt like I was in a vacuum, safe. The great claws swiped through all the doom and I awoke to a cold feline nose and what might soon become mewing.
There she stands, ready to squeak meow, looking at me with golden eyes. I feel safe. The woman is snoring turned away from me on her side. It feels comfortable. We’ll have quite a bit more pleasure.
The tiny black Bombay Cat moved to the foot of the bed, laying down, her head in the other dimension. On watch.
If only we would have watched the sun come up that one last time,
If only the scent of flowers would have reached our noses as the most fragrant smell ever tasted,
If only we can actually hear what we say to each other,
If only we would have seized the opportunity to know and to love each other in a most special and endearing set of ways,
If only we could have considered those other sets of choices for decisions we made,
If only we would have learned what it was like to feel loved and to know what made us feel loved,
If only we would have seized the opportunities in front of us and seen them as opportunities instead of solutions to problems,
If only in this moment and in every moment, we choose to cherish the special, beautiful moments life brings,
If only we can now stop tolerating apologists in any form and meet them with fields of fact,
If only the apathetic in the land of quit will awaken from the trance of narcissisms and inaction to stand with a more universal set of values in loving consensus,
If only we wouldn’t have to turn ourselves into solutions and we could keep ourselves in a gaseous state, not believing in much not worrying about anything. Only moving forward believing that the best possibilities will go beyond the worst outcomes…