She does and can

She fucked me and I slept well.

Yes, she crawled in my bed with me after a couple of days of affection.  She lay next to me enjoying her sleep, having her rest.  And there in a presence of “maybe he’ll wake up and we’ll have a passionate three-day fuck and love fest”, I did wake up with a throbbing hurt.  It seemed so proud like a blurred vision for some and sharp for others of an ever-lengthening Priapus moment.  We celebrated each other. I knew her every inch, passionately in touch, smell and the vision and sounds of her writhing in ecstasy.

She had little use for my compassionate masculinity of well lived in BALLS.

She held tightly and kissed perfectly.  She grasped the explosions of my innermost fuckIloveyouandyouknowitastrue.

When she isolated and separated temporarily I got busy for my day like always.  It always worked in the end and at least served as a reminder about keeping on and moving forward no matter what.  In good faith, it didn’t work to take anything to do with her personally.  Both of us did what we thought we wanted to do almost regardless of consequences which got fewer and fewer in keeping our word to ourselves.  Yes, there occurred anger and consternation.  Yes, we argued at lower and lower volume. Yes, we planned better than make up sex.

I got to act like a force field around her vulnerability.  Just presence and appreciation makes it work.

It generates in parts from both of us.

She came through the field with creative action enthralling everyone in various ways.

 

 

 

©humunculero2017

Honesty and Dishonesty

The facts are in – almost everyone acts dishonest at least occasionally.

Seemingly most of it entails situations which don’t have much importance to the individual lying.

So those of us who think we practice complete honesty and transparency may find ourselves from time to time lying or engaging in something not quite transparent. 

The Matrix Experiment found most people will cheat to some extent

https://www.elsevier.com/editors-update/story/publishing-ethics/a-fascinating-experiment-into-measuring-dishonesty

 

“Over 40,000 people, from all walks of life, participated in The Matrix Experiments.

What did we find?

  • On average, people solved four problems but reported solving six.
  • Nearly 70% cheated.
  • Only 20 out of the 40,000 were “big cheaters”, people who claimed to have solved all 20 problems. They cost the experiment $400.
  • We also found more than 28,000 “little cheaters” who cost the experiment $50,000.”

One study has shown up to 60% of people lie

“The study, published in the journal’s June issue, found that 60 percent of people lied at least once during a 10-minute conversation and told an average of two to three lies.”

https://www.umass.edu/newsoffice/article/umass-amherst-researcher-finds-most-people-lie-everyday-conversation

Men and women lie for distinct reasons:

““Women were more likely to lie to make the person they were talking to feel good, while men lied most often to make themselves look better,” Feldman said.”

” “It’s tied in with self-esteem,” says University of Massachusetts psychologist Robert Feldman. “We find that as soon as people feel that their self-esteem is threatened, they immediately begin to lie at higher levels.”

https://www.livescience.com/772-lie.html

So possibly it boils down to self-esteem.  If our self-esteem gets mostly genuine and we practice impeccability with our words, thoughts and actions we might lie a little bit less.  In doing this it gets very helpful to realize while we aim for 100% honesty, the first step of this may come in remaining honest with ourselves and when we discern we have lied to ourselves, stop it at the level of belief and thought so the poison doesn’t flow well from our mouths.  This means non-judgement, positive or negative.  It also means we will do our best to practice feeling loving toward ourselves individually.

In my own life, this provided an opportunity to use honesty to improve my life.  In work, it meant telling the truth about products and services so customers could make their decision based on facts with little embellishment.  It also meant telling my friends and family the truth more consistently.  Mostly I found I had to say less.  I didn’t have to support anyone with false embellishments or unnecessary compliments as making someone feel better about themselves with a lie will sooner or later get discovered and my credibility with them would suffer and the relationship would weaken seriously.

I have looked at my beliefs about myself.  The teachings from parents as a child served as helpful contradictions.  My mother gave me statements about me being a special person with extraordinary talent and ability and my father told me I would never amount to anything unless I learned to work hard for everything and this would start with deprecating statements about my behavior.  I had a lot of shame to overcome and it’s not all gone.  This affords me the opportunity to work with it consistently.

A new belief which helped me had to do with first accepting I had ultimate worth on the eternal scale of value, this served me until the realization came regarding the nonexistence of self.  No self, no self-esteem needed.  This contradicted the pop psychology of its reverse theories.  In this model, all seems connected to doing and actions which come from beliefs, thought, and feelings.  Seemingly we a feedback cyclicity of thoughts producing feelings and behaviors feeding back on prevailing beliefs many of which wound up erroneous.  In changing the beliefs and stopping the limiting thoughts from guiding actions I had to do less to keep myself honest.  It also meant offering less up in unsolicited feedback, something which seemed to prevail in the “meetings” of the twelve-step cult I attended for a couple of decades.  One of the best actions I took had to do with getting away from it and the toxicity in words spoken there, when really the only thing which worked well came from the love in unspoken support.  Knowing I am loved and encouraged to love myself made me feel love for myself and others almost unconditionally.

Since moving on from there I have made beneficial and limiting decisions about my life and I dedicate myself, imperfectly, to improving beliefs, thinking, and behaviors and calling up humble, loving feelings for myself.  Much of this has come in taking better care of my body and general health.  Along the way I have been able to genuinely help some others, giving me more loving feelings in general.

In the ongoing set of conclusions, having a multifaceted set of perspectives helps me to less judgmental conclusions and statements.  Looking at what I say based on observations before I say them – this takes a lot of mindfulness to do it effectively and I have sometimes gone to almost angry extremes to defend my stated perceptions about situations only to have to make amends for the behavior in stopping myself from doing it again and making things right in my best way possible.

Honesty it seems, ought to concern the truth and truth comes from knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt.  Reporting what happened, how I thought and felt seems like about all I can do regarding this.  Mostly, I strive to practice concise brevity as it gets too easy to slip into conjecture and verbose rhetoric.  In the utmost sense it looks like the less I believe about anything, the better as it leaves me more open to varied interpretations and perceptions which may have more objectivity.  If this seems self negating and contradictory, that will turn out a reader perspective.  I tend to characterize it more as a paradox like many other things human.

Everything-we-hear-is-an-opinion-not-a-fact.-Everything-we-see-is-a-perspective-not-the-truth.-Marcus-Aurelius

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

©2017MHumunculero

The Next AMERICAN (WET) DREAM –

billndon

Here’s your “out of thin air” ludicrous conspiracy theory of the week.

Once upon a series of moments in the political past, Trump and the Clintons were great pals.  He secretly invested in some of their foundation’s enterprises and reaped the benefits of exclusive referral introductions to profitable investment revenues.

Somewhere in the last two years Bill and Donald had a couple of conversations.  The latter explained to Bill he needed to rebrand himself and double or triple his billions, most of which were tied up as property assets.  Bill explained that Hillary needed to be President and maybe Donald could help by running with a ridiculous, outlandish campaign based on a plethora of the many things wrong with America.  He would use his best hypnotic language to engage the middle class white people who’d been left behind by Reaganomics and Neoliberalism.  He would appeal to their rage and disappointment and appeal to the hatred of government instilled in them by Repugnikans from Nixon forward.  He would appeal to all the Obama and Hillary haters, the bigots, the xenophobes, and the sexists through their victims’ eye view of the USA.

He would spin the big lie and gradually be exposed as by far the worst of two options.  The DNC Clintonites would take of the rest.  Trump might get the nomination and foil all the wacko extremists and weak kneed conservatives and moderates.  If so, he would self-sabotage his campaign, give the election to Hillary and rebrand himself with millions more potential customers.  The Clintons would extend their dynasty through much controversy as always and find themselves further beloved by the middle class and oppressed, all the while padding their beds for retirement after eight years.  This would cause the party of Lincoln to burn and rebirth, sucking back the moderates and realist conservatives into their fold and rebuilding with new and more appealing white people candidates.  This would cause the emergence of the Democratic Party as a moderate center – center party and give the Greens and Progressives the grass roots impetus to become the dominant party, working hard to save the Earth from climate change and to give the workers greater ownership in the means of production.

Oh well, I can dream, right!

AS ROME BURNS

AS ROME BURNS

 

You’ve got geodes on your nails,

You have abs like a pole vaulter,

You find yourself immersed in reality waste of time TV,

You’ve met men and don’t know it,

You want a leader and you won’t lead yourself,

Rome is burning and bags of saline on your chest and cock surgery do not help,

 

Rome is burning, the forests are dying,

fools believe these apocalyptic fairy tales,

They think they’ll be lifted into heaven

And don’t see their kingdom within the now,

And a disgrace to Orangs everywhere thinks he can lead a country,

Rome burns and he wants the next batch of profits,

 

Some people seem to appreciate and feel each other,

Some people seem to listen,

We don’t need more babies from you who don’t parent yourselves,

We won’t need any more self-indulgences,

Puking carbon into the sky,

Rome is burning and the oceans are dying,

 

Some of us do somethings which inspire others of us

To do the things which can save us all,

Yet too few really have a willingness to fight,

The corporations get richer and the poor get poorer,

People don’t go to the board rooms and slay these oppressors,

Rome is burning and the birds are dying,

 

Too many want to live by the ocean,

Too much trash floats out to sea,

There’s lead in the water,

And while people seem to get more intelligent,

They refuse to get up and refuse to do anything,

They don’t want to believe it and stand in the midst of a burning empire.

 

Rome is burning and there seems not enough remorse to salvage this world.

 

 

©2016mhumunculero

HE KNEW…

 

When she walked up to him and said, “I am glad you’re here!” He knew.

When she danced in front of the stage where he played his ass off she knew he watched her.

When she kissed him and looked into his eyes the first time, He knew.

She got drunk and asked him to make drinks in a certain way and drank and poured them on herself, telling him she wanted to be owned by him-he knew then.

She said, “I am your lover, your partner, your friend, I want you to be all those things…I love you and I know you love me…” He knew.

When they fought and he held his mud when it was about his perseverance and his boundaries and she loved despite the obvious difference, he knew.

When she came to him after great difficulties, knowing he would be there and showing it-he knew.

Many things came to the surface in their interactions. It seemed like a struggle, and really it seemed more about gaining familiarity. She asked and wondered how he could know his feelings so soon it made her suspicious of him because other less mature males had professed undying love and gone down the crazy road with her, causing torment and hovering like flies over a carcass. So when he fought inside himself not to pass it up and take on others for the sake of sex, he knew. He knew because the domain he created needed her as the Empress and inspiration. She wanted to mellow herself and gain impetus to succeed and she slowed because it felt like too much too soon. After twenty years and eighteen years with the August women, starting similarly and lasting long, he knew this one had a greater fit and more intensity and certainly great heaping portions of magical sensitivity and creative verve. She took nonsense and made magical sense of it with result and forward occurrences. She had to think because he would fight off and figuratively slay her suitors like Ulysses returned home and stringing the bow. Oh they were many, like the many women who came to him and sought his company and love. So large were their hearts and full of those they loved yet expansive for this love they would experience with one another.

So with both of them their health and well-being like most with great magical export, experienced their personal trials. He exorcised her more than once, eating her demons like grilled meat and she in the offering fucked him to greater power and illuminations. He found and expanded his love through sex and orgasm-hers and his, sometimes mutual. He opened the doors of secret darkness in the female aspect, rarely experienced by a man or a woman.

In this darkness he found her accumulated synthesis of thought forms, some with great malevolence; others with power grids of energy upcharge. Her monsters came to kill him and became food of the sort that magicians take in an evocation course.

His enchantments came to the helping of others and the extirpation of parasites.

Each time she would leave from frustrations with him, she would return to profess her love…

to be continued…

©2015MHumunculero

GTFO-Phoenix-leave if you MUST and Stay and be responsible if you Love it…

THAT’S CORRECTO!!!

Wahhhhhhhhhhhh!! I hate this heat, I am going to move to a cooler climate…” 

“I am moving to San Diego, I want to live by the beach…” 

“I am moving to Oregon…”

I have been very happy when you have done this, because it shows me you don’t like it here in Phoenix for whatever reasons.  Personally, I am pleased you have done this because it shows you feel no responsibility rooted in a sense of place here.  So will you do the same thing when you move to the other place?  I am wagering most will(however, I do know some who do and have) NOT!

Naught. 

Nil. 

I love it when bands leave because they thought the “golden opportunity” was in LA.  Cool, you can pay to play.  Cool, you can get tossed out of A&R-which has changed drastically in the last several years only to find you’re better off making it on your own with a real business plan centered around live performance and merchandising revenue…blah, blah, blah…the rest of the entertainment world wannabes actors, film writers, and etc. 

Why is it many have moved back here or to here in Phoenix AFTER making it big?  Read ’em and weep y’all. 

Let me go on by saying I love the desert and I love Arizona, the land, the summer heat, and the natives…you expatriate motherfuckers are excused so long as you feel a sense of community and duty to the community by supporting local enterprise and investing in the people already here. 

AZ desert

And to you shit media consumers of the alarmist variety hung up on illegal immigration bullshit. 

Guess what you patriotic knuckleheads? 

This area was invaded by the US Army and annexed overtime from Mexico.  So when Mexican nationals come here, some of them think of it as an age old right of  “la Raza”.  When indigenous tribes want a piece of the action, please know where that comes from too…  The real deal comes when we invest well in Mexico so that jobs are plentiful and of livable wages there-most nationals would rather be there with their families enjoying the prosperity.  Please note; most of the responsibility for this comes from employers HERE who don’t want to pay a local fair wages and are more than willing to hire a “illegal”…whom BTW, mostly contribute a great deal economically to our local economy with their earnings, just like “legal” citzen/consumers. 

And to those of you aching to move to “Cali” to live by and go to the beach:  WTF will you do when the motherfucking place runs out of water and people start really freaking out?

Tell me how you like the traffic and the overpopulation and the economy.

You might wish you lived back in the desert where we do a better job of water conservation(with the exception of groundwater).  You motherfuckers from back East who bitch about the heat and etc…PLEASE GO HOME for fuck’s sake…most will be moving there anyway when the water problem peaks here. 

Lastly, have you “I love to fly and travel” motherfuckers looked at your carbon footprint lately and how you contribute to man made climate change rather than becoming a climate denier because the climate change shit interferes with your life style? 

Have you looked at the air at 30,000 feet where jets travel on inter continental flights lately?

30K air

So piss on you and your shitty selfish, “I want to see the world” mentality.  You ought to be developing WIN-WIN scenarios locally and socially so the bullshit in this photo comes to an end…

OH and here’s a couple of Cali shots for you wanting to emigrate there….

calisea trash cali drought1